Mary's Christmas

Merry Twelfth Day of Christmas! 

Divine light shines from a child in a manger, reminding us that Divinity is not up there or out there, but right here, among us. However, this reflection isn’t about Jesus—it’s about Mary, the mother of Jesus. 

In the biblical account, Matthew simply tells us that Mary was pledged to be married to Joseph, but before they came together, she was found to be with child through the Holy Spirit. Thankfully, Luke offers some more information. Luke tells us that Mary was visited by the angel Gabriel, who declared to her, “Greetings, you who are highly favored, the Lord is with you!”

Mary, we’re told, is troubled.

The angel then tells Mary not to be afraid, that she’ll be with child, and that she’s to name the child, “Jesus.” To which Mary declared, “How is this to be since I’m yet a virgin?” And the angel answered, “The Holy Spirit will come upon you, the power of the Most High will overshadow you, and that which is born from within you, will be called ‘the Son of God.” And Mary, famously replied, 

“I am the Lord’s servant. May it be to me as you have said.”

Fast forward nine months and we bear witness to Christmas, the light of the world, when Jesus is born. But again, this reflection isn’t about Jesus—it’s about Mary, the mother of Jesus.

Mary, Through the Lens of Womanist Theology
If my experience in church is anything like yours then you know very little about Mary. What we often do with Mary—if she’s talked about at all—is we admire her famous response, “I am the Lord’s servant. May it be to me as you have said.”

If we go any further with Mary, it’s usually somehow connected to her surrender. I.e.: Mary surrendered to God’s will for her life.

If we go any further than that, we may even make Mary’s story into a principle. Something like: It is good to surrender to God’s will.

Of course, for most good protestants, God’s will is clearly articulated in the Bible, and so,  surrendering to God—like Mary—means obeying the Bible.

And suddenly, this strange, provocative, and revolutionary story involving a woman named “Mary” becomes a lesson on biblical obedience. But what if such response neuters the Mary story? Or, at least, what if there’s more to the Mary story that speaks to her experience from which we can learn?

Enter Womanist Theology. Womanist theology is a form of reflection that places the religious and moral perspectives of women at the center of its method. Womanist theology intentionally engages theological problems such as class, gender, and race. Furthermore, womanist theology reimagines old religious language and symbols in order to give them depth, texture, and relevance for today.

Mary is a young, betrothed, but yet to be married virgin, who says “yes” to a child—Divine light; Christ—inside of her very own body.

Through the lens of womanist theology I’d like to explain some of the implications to this story.

A young, betrothed, but yet to be married virgin who says “yes” to a child—even a divine child—inside of her body? Well, such a person would not have been received as the hero that Mary eventually became.

According to Jewish law, such a person—betrothed, yet to be married, and with child—had a name: adulteress. We actually see a woman like this in John chapter 8. In that story, the teachers of the law and Pharisees brought a woman before Jesus, saying, “Teacher, this woman was caught in the act of adultery. Now, the law of Moses commanded us to stone such women. What do you say?” 

It’s probably for this very reason that we read in Matthew chapter 1, these words:

Now the birth of Jesus the Messiah took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to dismiss her quietly.

You see, according to social mores and religious constructs, there was a way to deal with women who became pregnant without being married to a man.

But in this story?
Located in our sacred text?

Well, we read these words:

But just when Joseph had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit.”

Can you imagine? Joseph had lived his entire life in a world set on what to call a person like Mary. And, Joseph had lived his entire life in a world set on what to do with a person like Mary.

But in this story—a story in which a woman says “yes” to an experience that is outside of social mores and religious constructs? Well in this story—according to the angel—Mary’s “yes” to a child is conceived in her by the Holy Spirit.

Let us not miss the profundity. I mean, just for a moment, try and imagine a contemporary situation in which a person steps outside of acceptable social mores or religious constructs:

A person who chooses not to get married. 
A person who lives with a partner but is not married. 
A person whose gender identity is different than the sex assigned at birth.
A person who decides to get divorced.
A person who chooses to marry someone with the same sex. 

We religious people have names for such difference, don’t we? They’re not nice names. Nonetheless, they’re names that are sung in a thousand places. 

But here’s the thing—what if a person’s particular conception for their life isn’t foolish or sinful or ungodly? What if, like Mary—by stepping outside of acceptable social mores and religious constructs—a person may be saying “yes” to life as it is conceived in them by the Holy Spirit?

The Joseph Archetype
Joseph is an archetype. An archetype is a typical example of a person or thing. In the biblical account, Joseph is an archetype of social and religious privilege. As a cisgender, straight man, he was able to judge Mary’s burgeoning life as “inappropriate.” Furthermore, he was expected to treat a person like Mary in a certain way, which the text makes clear, he intended to follow through on with divorce.

Similarly today, it is most often heterosexual married people, or married people with kids, or people who have never been divorced, or straight people, or cisgender people who cannot conceive of the Holy Spirit rousing anything different in this world or in another person’s life. And unfortunately, the angel Gabriel isn’t popping up in the lives of societally and religiously normative people to declare, “Do not be afraid, for the child conceived in that person is from the Holy Spirit.”

And all of a sudden I’m writing about the Josephs in this world who have the privilege to decide how they will respond to a person like Mary. Whereas Mary had no idea that an angel would explain her situation to Joseph. All she had was her experience and her knowing, that her conception of God’s light—which was outside of social mores and religious constructs—was conceived in her by the Holy Spirit.

But here’s the thing… If Mary had responded to her experience like Joseph. That is to say, if Mary had held firm to societal and religious expectations by declaring, “I cannot and will not have a child until I am married!”

Then there would be
no Christ. 

There would be
no gift. 

Certainly, there would be 
no Christmas.

The Mary Archetype
And this brings me to Mary, who is also an archetype. Mary is an archetype of people who fall outside of social and religious expectations. Using an academic word to depict Mary’s experience, she was “queer," which is to say that Mary conceived of a life that was different from the norm.

Now we’re getting to the complexity of goodness that is Mary’s life. 

It was a life, inspired by God, that expanded the boundaries of socially and religiously acceptable ways of making Divine light manifest in this world. Much like people today who know that they know in their knowing, that they’re different. Although their path is not ordinary; although they may endure a whole bunch of othering by the Josephs all around them; they choose their truest and deepest selves and step into the life that God conceives in them.

To be clear, this is not wrong or sinful or unbiblical. Much the opposite! As I understand it, this is right and righteous and wonderfully biblical, like Mary, who invites us into conceptions of Christ that expand contemporary notions of God among us.

You see, basking in the light of Mary’s Christmas, that which is “queer” may very well be the formation of Christ, of gift, of Christmas in this world.

Moving Beyond “Slippery Slope” Fears
“Oh, well, that’s a slippery slope, trusting people’s knowing!”

Honestly, Josephs love to use that language. It’s as if—in their minds—any expression of life that’s different from their own and society will slip into utter chaos.

This is often how the thinking goes. It’s grounded in a belief that left on our own, we’ll just keep getting worse. But even our own Bible shows a trajectory from law to grace, from tribalism to inclusion, and from violence to peace. And our world, albeit messed up, is slowly moving toward something better: More rights, more care, more acceptance, more love. In fact, in the midst of all that’s bad, I want to say again and again, with Dr. King, that the moral arc of this universe is long but it bends toward justice.

For this reason, I don’t think the real fear is a slippery slope. I think the real fear is a world in which Joseph’s way is no longer the dominant way of being in the world. But here’s the thing, if Joseph’s way were to win out then there would be very little progress. Normal would be normal and that would be forever normal. But just look back 50, 100, 150, 200 years and you’ll see that it has most often been people like Mary—those who stood outside of that which was deemed to be acceptable—who have broadened the scope of that which society and religion call “good."

Singing Mary’s Christmas Song
On this Twelfth Day of Christmas, may Mary-the-different; may Mary-the-social-and-religious-construct-breaker, sing for all to hear: 

My soul magnifies the Lord,
Surely, from now on all generations will call me blessed;
for the Mighty One has done great things for me,
and holy is his name.

On this Twelfth Day of Christmas, may those who resonate with Mary’s experience enter more deeply into their knowing, trusting the leading of God who is forever breaking boundaries, especially through the lives of those who are “different.” 

On this Twelfth Day of Christmas, may the minds of Josephs change. To use a biblical word for that, may today’s Josephs “repent” as Mary’s children follow in her footsteps, and like Jesus, break barriers until every person truly belongs as they are, in their deepest knowing.

On this Twelfth Day of Christmas, may we all learn to trust the knowing of others and perhaps even declare with the angel Gabriel, “Do not be afraid, for the child conceived in you is from the Holy Spirit.”

And from our collective womb, may we Christians follow after our mother, Mary, who audaciously invites us into conceptions of Christ that expand this world’s notions of God among us.